Do You Suffer From the Fragile Writer Ego?
This article ended up in my inbox. In it the author said:
As writers, we have complicated egos. We can feel confident in other areas of our lives: maybe we know we’re parenting well, or we have other jobs we get kudos for, or we can make a mean mac and cheese or are the Grillmaster of the neighborhood. But when it comes to our writing, we’re just.not.that.sure.
I would love to write here that I do not have a fragile author ego, but I would be lying.
Yes, I have come to terms with all kinds of reviews, but even then the 1 Star review inevitably outweighs in importance to the 5s or 4s. Yes, I know not everyone likes my writing. Yes, I have issues with publishers, or other authors, and likewise I am convinced they have issues with me as well. I get that my contemporary books outsell my paranormal books by a wide margin. Yes, I am a full time author that sits in my office all day writing. Alone. ROFL.
I am way past just being lucky. I am full time author with a few books under my belt, and more coming, with amazing author friends and fantastic readers who support me so much. Still, I sometimes look at other authors with envious eyes. People who can create magical worlds in paranormal books, others who create a book that I read and I WISH I had written it, others who get to number one and stay there.
So, going back to the quote above. I’m not sure I excel in other parts of my life, although I think I’m a pretty cool mum. Even with those books out, even with successes and failure, and good reviews and bad, I still have kittens every time I release a new book.
And as to GRL, I will still be the Brit who looks dead confident, but who inside is not entirely sure why people buy their books, or why they want to talk to me. And hell, what do I say back? What is it that readers and other authors want me to say? Why am I so stressed about this?
Are you completely confident in some part of your life? Or do you judge yourself by impossibly high standards? Are you an introvert in an extrovert’s coat?
RJ Scott Is a GRL Featured Author: Writing MM Romance with a Happy Ever After…
I am in awe that people read my writing and thank you all for taking the time to read, rate and review. Rj xxxxx
About me…I live in the UK just outside London. I love reading anything from thrillers to sci-fi to horror; however, my first real love will always be the world of romance. My goal is to write stories with a heart of romance, a troubled road to reach happiness, and more than a hint of happily ever after.
Find RJ at: Website | Facebook | Twitter | Goodreads
The Book A Reason To Stay – buy links, excerpts and reviews HERE
When SEAL, Viktor Zavodny, left small town America for the Navy he made sure he never had a reason to return for anything other than visiting family. He wanted to see the world and fight for his country and nothing, or no one, was getting in his way. He fights hard, and plays harder, and a succession of men and women share his bed.
But a phone call from his sister has him using his thirty day down time to go home instead of enjoying his usual thirty nights of random sex and sleep.
What he finds is a mystery on the Green Mountains and the only man attempting to make sense of seemingly unrelated deaths. His childhood friend and first love… Lieutenant Aiden Coleman, Sheriff.
There were reasons Viktor left his home. Not least Aiden Coleman with his small town innocence and his dreams of forever. Now Adam and Viktor need to work together to save lives and prove there is a hero in all of us.
When it’s done, if they make it out alive, can Aiden persuade Viktor that he has a reason to stay? Maybe forever?
The Giveaway: RJ Scott is offering the chance for one lucky reader to win a $10 Amazon or ARe gift voucher, reader’s choice!
All you have to do to enter is leave a comment right here, and you’re automatically entered in the contest. Comments must be received by Midnight Pacific Time on Tuesday, June 3, 2014. One winner will be selected at random on Wednesday, the 4th, and notified via email for prize delivery.
Good luck!
please count me in :)
reading Broken Memories (In the Shadow of the Wolf, #2) right now…LOVE it!
Please count me in I love R J books.
ShirleyAnn(at)speakman40(Dot)freeserve(Dot)co(Dot)uk
I have a number of RJ’s books on my TBR list, will have to add this one to it too. Please count me in for the giveaway. Thanks
Hi RJ. I’m a member of The Novel Approach family and I happen to love Lisa to bits. I read your piece with great interest.
I think I was nervous when the first book came out and I’m always nervous when I submit a new book to the publisher. But I don’t dither about reviews, because they are opinion. As you say, some people will like what we write and others won’t.
I never worry about ratings on Amazon because they change every hour. You can mire yourself in that and worry, but those ratings really mean nothing. Goodreads is toxic to an author’s mental health and I’ve stayed away from there for many months now and am better for it.
I’ve written my story to the best of my ability. I’ve taken my editor’s advice, studied and honed my skill and will continue to do that. Conquering passive voice was a huge advancement for me. I danced a jig when that happened. No, I don’t judge myself by impossibly high standards. I do my best and let the book assume the life it should.
And yes, I am completely confident in most aspects of my life. I’ve reached an age where I see proof of the success in raising three fantastic children, with the help of my wonderful husband. One of them was born physically disabled, rather severely, and yet, she went to college, not once but twice, is independent, and what she can’t do, her husband does for her. After raising her, nothing else seems difficult.
When you send out a book, much as we do with our children, release it to the world, say a prayer, and write the next one. Sales, positive reviews, and our wonderful readers will come along as they do. Wrestling mammoth success in the writing business is much like trying to capture the mist. While you’re trying, you spend a lot of time you should spend writing the next great novel.
Much success to you, RJ.
Count me in please.
Anything R.J. Scott writes, I read. Please count me in.
Wonderful opening, R.J. Not much I can add to Brita’s response other than to say, “I hear you both,” and totally agree. :) Paul
I have loved everything I have read by R.J. Thanks for a chance at the giveaway! :)
Thanks for the insight and the giveaway!
I am looking forward to reading this!
Please count me in as well. Thanks
As a reader I couldn’t imagine giving someone a 1 or 2 rating. I can’t write worth a damn so I have a lot of respect for people who can. Their stories and characters have kept me company during some really bad times in my life. My vocabulary has increased, and I have learned new things all from reading a book. So my hats off to all authors. Oh, and thanks for the chance to win, PS Love the Texas and Ellery Mountain series. :)
Thanks for the the post. I am definitely an introvert who has to pretend to be a confident extrovert at work. I am the team lead for my team and everyone thinks I know what I am doing (for some strange reason) and comes to me for all sorts of things. They don’t realize I am making a lot of it up as I go. :-)
I am definitely an introvert pretending to be a confident extrovert a lot of the time. Thanks for the post and the chance to win!
From reading many author posts on Facebook and on blogs I think the fragile ego is widespread, but if you read the readers comments… Unnecessary. Inevitable but Unnecessary. I love all books RJ. Thanks for the opportunity to win.
HUGE RJ fan!
I cannot wait to meet you in person at GRL this year! I’ll be the goofy gray-haired old lady standing motionless with my mouth hanging open not know what in the world to say to you. Oh, and I’ll be holding a bag of Sour Patch Kids for you.
My fave book of yours? The Christmas Throwaway. Love Zach & Ben. Followed very closely by Riley & Jack!!
xoxoxo
I flip flop between being confident and judging myself by impossibly high standards.
I’ve always set high standards for myself and no matter what push through till I complete.
Love the sound of the book, definitely going on my TBR.
Great post. Thank you for the giveaway!
woops sorry finger got a bit trigger (click?) happy there. I’m extremely introvert. I don’t usually feel confident in the things I tend to pursue/ do. I do have high expectations of myself and I try to meet them.
Introvert with an extrovert mask. Thanks for the giveaway!
Yes, I am an extreme introvert, confident at work and home, I am my own worst critic and deep down inside I am insecure and scared of failure. You are not alone, dear RJ, we love your books and when we meet at GRL, we can chat over a cup of tea (with milk)
I was lucky enough to meet RJ last year at GRL, and she is fabulous in person! Although, her hubby might have stolen the show ;) Her books are great and always cant wait for the next one! Now…if I can just grab her away from bar and Amber this year LOL
I love RJ’s books. Wish I could go to GRL. Maybe next year. :-)
Love a chance to win. kbmckee at mail dot com
I am an introvert most of the time, but when I drive I am more extrovert maybe because I was taught by a very extrovert person and the driving test staff always said they could tell her pupils, when they came for their driving test, because of their confident driving skills. I love RJ’s work, so thank you for a chance to win this gift token to buy more of her books :-D
I am an introvert most of the time, but when the need arises my extrovert tendencies are capable of coming out. Thanks for the post and the giveaway!
Good morning, everyone, and thanks for participating in RJ’s countdown to GRL giveaway. The contest is closed and the winner’s been selected. A $10 gift card to Amazon or ARe, your choice, goes to
schofield726
Congratulations to you! I’ve already emailed RJ with your contact information, so expect to hear from her soon.